Art, Taxes and Abandoning Ship

The purpose of art is washing the dust of daily life off our souls.

Pablo Picasso

Today has not been my favorite day. Or yesterday either, if I'm truly honest. The past 48 hours  has been a miserable endeavor of math and paperwork. That's because once a year the government forces me to take all the receipts that have been collecting dust in a basket and put them in an organized fashion for tax time. I realize it's only February, but my husband is the one who forces me to do this before April 15th. Because I'm a recovering Pollyanna, I feel that I must also document every single receipt into a spreadsheet  to make sure that the tax lady doesn't forget anything and accidentally give me less of a refund than I have due. The only redeeming thing about spreadsheets is that it does the math for you. That's worth something to me.

But wow, what a headache. And what a sobering reminder that my income as an artist compared with the energy expended doesn't seem to match up very well. This is the time of year that I wonder if I could be making a six figure salary if I worked this hard for a corporation. A steady paycheck of a decent amount sounds so lovely. Not having to find my own gigs or drum up business sounds wonderful too. Ah, the life. But whenever I'm about to abandon my little ship and apply for a 'real job', the thought of someone else telling me how to spend the hours in my day stops me in my tracks. I realize that in order to work for a corporation, I'd really want to be the boss of the corporation which only comes with the same headaches and responsibilities at a much higher level! (Notice how I assume that I actually could be the boss of a big corporation…I'm a Queen Bee.) I might as well keep being the boss of my little music company, play the piano, write songs and call it a day.

Can I work at being content? Or does it come when you don't even notice? I suppose that's another 'try hard not to be hard on yourself' type scenario. I think I'll prescribe a movie and a comfy blanket and I'll be content for tonight. Which is something.